Big Fat Tears on a Really Important Day

Sunday, June 30th, 2019. Right behind my wedding day and the birth of my children, this is a day that I will absolutely never forget.  Cooper was baptized on this day. 


A few months prior, on our way home from church, Cooper started asking questions about being baptized.  He had a lesson on it during Sunday school and whatever he learned, seemed to sink in with him.  I answered all his questions with a little help from Kevin. 

A few days later, while we were running errands together, Cooper said to me, I want to be baptized.  I am ready.
I told him I would look into this for him and then forgot.  Cooper didn't forget, he reminded me daily.  I contacted our church and signed him up.  I haven't seen Cooper any happier.  He was so very excited for the big day to come.

When the day arrived, I couldn't keep the smile off my face and when his turn came, I just broke down and sobbed.  It was my proudest moment as a mom to date.  I wasn't saved until I was 28 years old and Cooper is so far ahead of me. He just a little spiritual warrior, so eager to talk about Jesus and so pure of heart. 

I am so very excited for Cooper and the new life ahead of him.

Summer Loving

Summer is what I love most about Northern California, specifically, early summer.  The days are warm, the evenings are breezy and the nights are cool enough to sleep with the windows open.  It's my absolute favorite.  

The kids have recently picked up fishing, after a few visits with my dad, it was hard not to enjoy fishing.  Often, in the evenings, we'll walk up to the levee and fish for a bit. The boys are great at baiting their hook and casting but refuse to touch the slimy fish once caught.  They are such girls!

It's nice to sit, disconnected and watch them have fun and enjoy the sunset.  They are so competitive, both trying to beat the other to catch the most fish. 

I try to remind myself to slow down in these moments and enjoy this sweet time. 

We did it! Finally.

Late last year, our neighbor stopped by.  She had one simple request, please cut the tree down in your backyard.  It was a 65 y ear old ash tree and was causing damage to her pull.  We mulled over it for a few months, I hated the idea of cutting down such a large tree and of losing the great shade it provided for the house.  In January, we finally cut it down along with a trio of pesky pine trees on the other side of the yard.

We were left with a yard that was much larger than we realized, a lot of mud and no idea how what to do with it.  After a few weeks of back and forth, we committed to a pool and basketball court for the boys.

As parents, we want our kids around, not only to make sure they're safe but to see who they're spending their time with.  We set out on a 6 month journey - filled with lots of back and forth, creative "disagreements" and mud.  Tons of mud.

The end results was more than we could have ever imagined.  We have created a second living area for our home.  We've spent more time in our backyard over the last few months than we have since we moved in.  It's been great.  I'm so very excited and proud of our little project.

There's no crying in baseball

Parker, 8, ready to play catcher.

There's no crying, unless you are me.  Parker moved up to play with the big boys this year.  No more machine pitch, no more coach pitch.  He started playing with 3rd, 4th and 5th graders this year.

As we started the season, I was so worried about him.  I cried when he struck out for the first time.  I cried when he stole his first base, when he scored, when be played catcher.  I cried really hard when he was pulled up to pitch for the first time.

My tears were a mixture of fear - he's so small out there - and pride - he's actually really talented on the field.  It wasn't until this year that I finally realized what it must have been like to be my parents on the sidelines.  I want my kids to do so well, to excel at it all and there are oftentimes when I just can't make that happen and it was really hard to sit back and just watch.

Kevin and I had to keep reminding ourselves to be fans.  Our mantra all season long for both boys, just be fans.  Support them to no end, cheer them on and let them know how proud you are (even when they make bad plays or don't swing the bat game after game).

The good news - he survived.  The even better news, Parker was selected for our league's All Star team!  We have a summer of baseball ahead of us!

School's out for summer!

The boys wrapped up first and second grade last week.  We are well into the dog days of summer, they are busy this week with baseball camp and will send the rest of summer at day camp. 

They both had a fantastic year, full of friends, fun and learning, of course.  Both Parker and Cooper are really thriving.  Cooper is a friend to all and Parker has a really tight knit group of boys that I hope will be lifelong friends.  I'm really thrilled for both of them.  They are growing into wonderful young boys.

They both excelled in math and reading.  Cooper has a knack for drawing and story-telling and Parker is a whiz at writing. 

I am beyond proud of both of them and excited for the summer ahead.  Looking forward to soaking in every bit of it.

She's so fancy

Digging for buried treasure.

Hadley called me via FaceTime and this is what I got to watch while talking to her.  A solid 10 minutes of booger picking.  she chatted away with me, all while maintaining a finger in nose position.

I think this is what I love most about her.  She's not your typical girlie girl, not overly sensitive nor do her emotions tend to vary much.  When she's happy, there's no one better to be around and when she's angry with you, it's like trying to wrestle a bear.

She's such a unique little girl, tough as nails.  She won't cry when her brothers are too rough, she gets knocked down and gets right back up.  She won't let them see her upset and she rarely backs down from either one of them. Kevin and I often have to peel her off the boys after they've crossed her path. 

I love every ounce of her, her tenacity, her independence and her funny sense of humor.  She's great and I wouldn't change anything, except maybe the booger picking.

This kid right here.

Don't mind the upside down award. :)

I received a note last week from Cooper's teacher asking me to attend that Friday's award ceremony.  She told me he was being recognized for his accomplishments in learning.  I was immediately filled with a sense of pride, not only for myself but for Cooper.

He's been working so very hard in all areas of his life, in school, at home and on the ball field.  I was so very excited for him to finally be recognized.

When his teacher got up to speak, she told me what I already knew, Cooper was working really hard in school.  What I didn't know was that not only was he working hard to help himself, he was spending time in his classroom offering to help others. 

When she said this, I broke into tears.  I wanted Cooper to do well for Cooper, I hadn't encouraged him to try to help others, he just did it.  He's like his dad in this way, less concerned about his own success and more concerned about everyone around him. I'm so very thankful for this dad for this wonderful trait.

Way to go, Kev. You've taught him well.

In the blink

October 2018

Just like that, life has passed me by.  It's been years since my last post.  The babies are still my babies, just older.  Hadley is now 4, thinks she is 14, Cooper is almost 7 and Parker is a very mature 8 year old.

They are all active, so very active.  We've got sports, lots of sports and tap dancing.  As we entered into 2019, our lives seemed really full.  Work for me was overwhelming at times, I found myself working nights and weekends.  Sitting at my kitchen counter at 5am on a Saturday just to keep up with my work Monday to Friday.

Easter 2019

Just when I thought I couldn't handle any more, I was provided with an opportunity that I just couldn't turn down.  I left my career in the grocery industry and I've returned to working for a local advertising agency. 

Talk about a breath of fresh air and an immediate change of pace.  Things aren't necessarily slower here, just different.  I'm waking of parts of my brain that I haven't used in years and it's so very refreshing.  I've got job flexibility and my stress levels have plummeted.  I feel present in my own life and I'm really excited about what's to come - hopefully more updates like this one.

Sweet Saturday Mornings

Spring is creeping up on us and it's going to bring a busy schedule.  We aren't playing any sports now, aren't committed to anything and on most weekends, we have very little to do.  It's really nice to be able to just slow down, stay in pajamas until noon and just relax.

I'm trying to soak up this time, sort of dreading the beginning of baseball season but also excited to see both of the boys on the field this year.  Such a double edged sword. I'm sure once the weather warms and it's nice outside, I'll be begging for something to do but for now, I'm content with jammies and snuggles.

Hadley, Do You Love Me? Let me count the ways.

Hadley is growing up quickly.  She's talking all the time and really active.  She spends Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings with her dad.  He's claims he enjoys this time but I think he's a real trooper for trying to wrangle her three days a week.

Kevin recently sent me this video. I have to admit, I have watched it at least a dozen times.


I love that he loves her this much and that she's so fiercely independent. I know she's only two but it's hard not to be proud of this sassy little thing.

Good Bye 2016.

While in the car over the weekend, Parker chastised me for using my phone too much.  Talk about a really wicked wake up call.  Put the phone down, disconnect and just be here, in the moment.

I am trying to remind myself that our life is the only one that matters.  I don't want someone else's Christmas, or birthdays or vacations.  I don't need to be wrapped up in photos from a life that someone else is living.  I need to remember every single minute of my own days with my babies, who aren't really babies any more.

In 2017, I'm going to try to slow down, take a few breaths and live my life, every day.

Wish me luck and sanity....

She Makes Me Feel Like a Rockstar!

The most favorite part of my day work day is coming home to this face.  She shrieks at the top of her lungs and it makes me feel like a complete rockstar.  I just love reaching the top of the stairs, catching her attention and watching her face light up.

She's walking now, says the word dog and wakes up in the sweetest mood every single day. She has stolen my heart in a way I didn't know was possible.

Hadley Grace is 1!

Our little love bug turns one today.  What a joy she is in our lives.  She is so very easy going and patience, sweet and kind.  She just adores her older brothers and tries so very hard to keep up with them.  

She has been walking for almost 6 weeks now, just got her two front teeth (for Christmas) and loves to snuggle.  Unlike the boys, she tends to sit back and just soak up her surroundings, studying people and things.  She's very friendly and the only person she hasn't liked upon first introduction was Santa which I am sure she will soon get over.

We celebrated her first birthday over the weekend and it was so nice to see how many people love this little girl.  It really does take a village and we are so blessed to have such great family and friends in our lives.

It's Been Too Long...

I can't believe it's been almost 6 months since my last post.  Life is busy to say the least and I've just been distracted.

We had an active summer with soccer, Cooper and Kevin's birthdays, a visit to DisneyLand and our first kid-free trip to Hawaii to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. Summer was completed with a new job for Kevin and a trip to Boston to celebrate the marriage of two of our closest friends.  It has definitely been a bit of a blur.

The babies are getting so big.  Hadley has two teeth now, she's beginning to walk and much to my dismay, she's saying da-da.  She just adores her big brothers and is tough as nails.

In an attempt to actually capture our kids while they are still babies, we found a local photographer and I am just thrilled with the outcome. The session was short and we were a bit stressed but our photographer was such a pro.  Our session started with Cooper requesting that the photographer "take a picture of his back".  Needless to say, she did, he was thrilled and complied the remainder of the session.  He's definitely my wild one!

Parker, almost 5 years old

Cooper, 3 years old

Hadley, 10 months

As I think back over the summer, I have so many sweet memories and I know that we had a great summer but I have so few photos.  I am going to once again, make this my New Years resolution - take more photos or keep in touch with my new found photographer.

Business Casual

Cooper is my little firecracker.  This morning, while getting dressed, he decided the simple blue t-shirt that I picked out just wouldn't work for his Thursday.  He marched into his room and picked out this outfit.

That's right ladies, it's a clip on and those are shorts AND crocs.

This kid is so wonderful. So over-the-top and I love every ounce of it.  He loves big and loathes big.  He's full of such personality.  I just love to sit back and watch him interact with those around him.  Kevin and I often compare him to Ferdinand the Bull.

He's such a great protector and lover.  He's going to be a great man one day.

Here Comes Summer.

Summer is approaching.  Parker is playing tee ball on the weekends now and we are eagerly anticipating opening day of the neighborhood pool.  A few weeks ago, Kevin even gave the boys their "summer cuts".  I think they look a bit like concentration camp survivors.

Nice and clean after a bath.  

He thinks this is a right of passage.  Every boy must have their head buzzed prior to the start of summer, it's how summer really gets started. I'm learning to love the shorter hair, it's definitely easier on me.

Hadley is 5 Months Old.

I'm not really sure where the time has gone.  Hadley is 5 months old today.  She's such a sweet baby. Almost rolling over, starting to push up to crawl and talking a ton.  She's so very easy-going.  Low maintenance and just a sweet baby.

Watching Parker play tee ball.

I'm really struggling with her getting older.  I know she's my last one and I'm just not ready for her to grow up.  She still sleeps in bed with us and I really cherish the quiet time and just listening to her breath.

I'm not sure why watching my little girl, my last one, grow up is so difficult for me.  With Parker and Cooper, I eagerly anticipated every milestone, with Hadley, I am dreading them. It's time for her to try real food for the first time and for the last few weeks, I've just put off trying.  I can't even push myself to buy rice cereal. I keep telling myslef, "I'll do it next week".  I think next week is finally here.  I've just got to find a way to deal with my own emotions, revel in her growth and cherish the memories of her.

And now, we are a family of five.

Our little Miss Hadley Grace has arrived.  She is here and she is perfect in every way.  They boys, Kevin included, are just over the moon for her.

She eats well, she sleeps well and she is an all around easy-going baby.  She made her grand entrance into the world on Monday, December 15th at 6:43pm.  She was 7 pounds, 15 ounces and just under 20" long.  She has dark brown hair that might be curly and two tiny cowlicks on the back of her head, just like her dad.  For now, her eyes are blue.  They look a lot like Parker's did when he was born.

She is a very delicate baby, much different from her brothers.  All of her features are tiny and sweet. She has long skinny legs and arms, tiny little toes.  I guess she is everything that a little girl should be...

We are so very excited to introduce her to the world and can not wait to watch her grow.

It's A...

You read it right.  We are expecting a little girl in December.  I wanted to wait, I really did but I'm so glad that I know we are expecting a little Miss in December.  I have so much work to do and planning.  Lot's of planning.  We have all the major pieces, the crib and dresser and stroller and carseats.  That stuff doesn't really matter to me.

What I am more focused on is the nursery.  It took me over a dozen paint samples and four weeks to finally decide on a color.  My poor husband was a trooper during it all.  He even volunteered to repaint the ceiling and trim in the room.  We landed on a nice subtle taupe.  Not too gray, not too brown.  Just right.

I want the accessories to be shades of coral and peach, with very little pink in the room.  Thank goodness for Pinterest, it found just want I was looking for in a color scheme.

I want warm colors with a touch of gold but not too girlie, more fancy garden. Let's hope my lack of a green thumb doesn't get in the way. 

Whirlwind

taking a dip in the river, Summer 2014

I have been quiet for a bit too long so I thought that I would come back with a big bang...we are expecting baby #3 in December.

Things were just getting a bit too boring around here and a little too easy.  We only have one in diapers and Cooper seems to finally be past a bit of "terrible twos" that we thought might do us both in.

Santa Cruz Beach, Spring 2014

Parker is a walking, talking man now.  Into everything, questioning everyone and a bit too bossy at times.  He is basically pay back for the first 18 years of my life.  I have to laugh at times, if I were to put a wig on him, I would be arguing with myself.  He's really smart and at times, it's a bit scary but so very exciting.

ready for bed

Cooper is a menace and Parker's shadow.  Kevin often describes me as a Sour Patch Kid, first she's sour, then she's sweet, that's Cooper too.  He has a heart of gold and just lights up a room until you cross him, or he's tired, or hungry.  We try to keep him well fed and rested to combat two of the three.

visiting the Calaveras Big Tress, Summer 2014

Life is grand right now.  We are so very in love and it's hard not to be.  We have been truly blessed with two of the most wonderful little terrors ever put on earth and I can't wait until #3 rolls in town to mix things up a bit.

Our due date is late November/early December, December 9th to be exact.  All dates are great, except November 30th, Parker will never ever ever forgive me for that one.  (He still talks about "that one time when dad didn't bring my bat to the ball game"), 12:01 on December 1st sounds just fine.